I suppose

I suppose that over time I will gain "the serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed; courage to change that which can be changed, and wisdom to know the one from the other." I hope that I'll be able to accept the wisdom in that statement even though I know that it's from a prayer and so, most people that desire these strengths are praying to get it from God. Being an atheist, I don't get that fun little security blanket; I don't get to depend on some all knowing or all powerful being to grant me anything.
I can see why my mother thinks it's ridiculous that I would choose to be Buddhist or completely without any established spirituality (I say this because I believe Buddhism has elements of something Divine). It seems common sense to choose the easier path. The easier path is the one in which we are not totally responsible for the things we do and say, not totally responsible for the people we become. This is the greatest flaw and the greatest virtue of Buddhism, in my opinion. It is a flaw because I can see where people see the difficulty in such a decision. It's sort of like the last two lines of the poem "Invictus," the poem ends "I am the master of my fate/ I am the captain of my soul." To take responsibility for self in that capacity is scary. I know, I am trying to do it, and I am trying to do it coming out of a Christian background, wherein my actions were fickle, changeable, forgivable, excusable. But what I see now, or the truths I believe I have found say something worth knowing: In the grand scheme of things, my existence is insignificant, but in the blink that is my life as compared to all time, I should still try to do the best I can to be the best I can to achieve the ultimate peace of mind and experience the universe as it is, was, and will be. And I suppose, that's the best anyone can hope for.